Self Reflect

A lot of things happened within these 3 months. A lot of things are positive and contribute a lot to my personal growth. However, nothing is always as rosy as we want it to be. We carved a comfortable path for all to thread on. The path is clear and beautiful but along the way, people may steal some flowers from your lawn... But that's life... there's bound to be some set backs and hiccups... which makes the experience more challenging, more colourful, more complete which helps build our character and gives us an opportunity to create legends and stories we can tell to touch our kids and grand kids....who will in turn be proud to tell their kids and grand kids and generation to come.

I take responsibilities for things that happen... and I tend to analyse it a lot especially when it concerns me, to see what I could've done better to make the outcome more positive. I'd like to learn from the situation and better myself in the process. So now it's time for self reflect.. and see how I can do things better... Will update more when I find myself...

Practical Management 101: Maturity level

To groom someone to become a manager, you must first identify their maturity level. This maturity level here doesn't direct correspond with age. It doesnt mean older is wiser in management. It's the amount of exposure and experience a certain mind has gone through before the mind has mature to the management level to understand why certain management decisions are made.

When my friends and I first started work, fresh out of school and all naive, we used to play more than we worked. Of course, there was the usual gossip/grousing against "management" and the boss. We used to hate our bosses coming into the room during our gossip sessions... until one young girl (who also gossiped with us), maybe 18, told us off, by reprimanding "Of course the boss have to be strict with us. Don't expect the boss to come gossip with us to encourage us not to work. The company will "chup lup" (fold) lor..."

She was way matured for her age to be able to think for the bosses. True enough, with her maturity level, it was quick for her to rise the corporate ladder, being a manager after 1.5 years.

Sometimes you see some people become "pets" of bosses.... mostly because these "pets" have matured to a level where they know what the management likes and is able to act before the management tells them what to do ... (actually it applies outside the office as well... Try pre-empting what your spouse wants to eat and prepare that for dinner, or give your partner a massage before he/she ask for it on a day when he/she is tired..... I am sure you will become the apple of your partner's eye and guarantee to reap very positive results *wink* *wink*)

So if you can think like your bosses, then you have somewhat reach a certain management maturity level. If you can think FOR your bosses, you have reached an even higher management maturity level. If you can think of SOLUTIONS FOR your bosses... then... you know.. you are close to taking over your boss ahhahaah...

Moral is... to groom someone to fill certain shoes (positions)...select your candidate carefully, first you need to see his appetite to the task (appetite will determine the drive and motivation) and check his maturity level. The last thing you want is to promote someone who will bite you on the hands just when you need him the most... Ensure your staff's maturity level is there where you want it, and develop it accordingly to ensure high standard level of the delieverables.

If the staff has no heart or no appetite and haven't mature to the management level, then just forget it. Dont waste time on grooming him, as you can never teach an old dog new tricks.

BW

Was being bogged with a terribly hard puzzle last week. Something that made me wonder hard and long… and made several of my colleagues thought hard and long too. Almost cannot eat and sleep thinking about it.. ahhaha Exaggerated a little…

You see, there’s a floor in our building that is labeled as BW in our elevators. I am new to the building and I was intrigued by the BW on the lift. Several inquiries fell onto deaf ears as nobody knows what “BW” stands for. I asked my best friend Mr Google and he too drew blanks. I was told that BW stands for Barang Wilayah, Black and White, in BetWeen, BaWah and other such nonsense. And the funny thing was, I was told that it was a “ghost floor”. Every building comes with its ghost stories but this one takes the cake. She told me wide eyed with all honesty, “Really geh…. There’s one floor nobody dares to go to. And it is not accessible also. Go ask Gavin and the operators and see… and they will tell you all kinds of stories… “

Just so happen, I called a dear friend from MBA classes the other day to catch up... Coincidentally, he worked in the same building before 10 years back... and told me that.... BW .... stands for..... Breeze Way...

Why Breeze way? Well, it's because that part of the building is open air and the corridor serves like an airwell which welcomes a flow of breeze to ventilate that floor... thus, Breeze way lor...

Hahaha...

Another mystery is history….

Relativity Concept

Everything is relative... I watched 3 movies today, Jennifer's Body, Bounty Hunter and New Moon... And even though New Moon wasn't like drop dead good with lots of loose ends, somehow, after 2 bad movies, New Moon seems like "Wow, this is great romantic stuff... I like..." .... So if you wanna look good, try the relative concept.. Stand next to losers :P

Thank God for the internet...

Probably have internet withdrawal symptoms.. havent been well since yesterday...

And so coincidentally my streamyx was down...

Luckily I have recently converted my mobile phone line to an unlimited data plan.... so I am able to connect to the internet via my mobile phone..

Incidentally, once I got my connection back via mobile phone, I don't feel so sick anymore....In fact, the doctor also couldn't find anything wrong with me....

Thank God for technology... now, everyone can stay connected with everyone through the www. Cool...

(btw, just in case you are wondering, today is a public holiday and thus, no.. I didn't go to a doctor just to get MC)

life is all about learning - another first today...

Had my first taste of interviewing and picking staff today. And guess what? My first candidate is a gwai lo ... lucky me... hahaha...

Well, he was from Iran.. big, tall and handsome... but ... didn't have enough technical skills to carry him through... I do look for brains over brawns.. .hahaha... No offense... We didn't make it a difficult interview but we just want to ensure the people who come in can start work immediately.

Anyway, the second candidate, a sweet honest lady was much better and we decided to give her a try...

Well, I learnt how to gauge people from their first looks and how they answer questions ... pleasant... and I guess I still have to do a lot more of these.. There's also the price negotiations skills which I have yet to learn... One step at a time....

Reach for the stars

Just my 3rd week and I feel that I have undergone more training than 3 years if I were to stay in previous company.

I am attending Java training now,... a programming tool just to equip ourselves with the basic Java knowledge since the fundamental language used to write the core system prorgams here is Java.

There's so much to learn here... and I am given the opportunity to learn from the best players of the industry.... imagine, the CEO meets with us to touch base with us and plays an active role in giving input and feedbacks on most projects. Awesome.. I get to see how management works, how they brainstorm. Yes, I know I have to learn fast, so that I can spread my wings to fly on my own... but I know that the correct guidance and appropriate training is available for me to tap on.

And I also get a taste on how other functional areas works as we all work closely together. I even get to see how the sales do their work and also have a taste of the work of a PA... These job functions are usually not available for my viewing due to the back room nature of my work. Now, I get to see what they do and how they operate (or how they entertain ... hahaha).. .

There's so much to learn... let us all reach for the stars...... When you reach for the stars, even if you don't always end up getting a star, at least you will not end up with a hand full of dirt. - (adapted from Leo Burnett)

Lego

Lego... They are such wonderful inventions...

So creative and so educational ... and so meaningful...

Each piece is a building block to the entire complete structure. No piece is too small ... all are important...

Bryan finished building his T-rex today (Allosaur which he promptly corrected me as it has 3 fingers), and he proudly paraded it to us... When we finally goes to bed, he bid litte Allosaurus good night... :) Such a cute gesture... He must be really proud to be able to conquer the T-rex ...with little help ..

Anyway, I am slowly putting the pieces of my new career together.... sort of like building up my own lego as well... Let's hope I can tame my T-rex just as easy as Bryan.. :)

Happy Birthday Bryan... :)

The on-boarding experience was great.. :)

The experience today was superb....

Was anxious initailly like all first timers would be...

But with the help of some caring friends, super efficient IT and a diligent HR... the on-boarding experience was a very very pleasant one.

For one, the traffic had been kind... reached there in record time at 7:45am. 40 minutes from home at peak hour... that's a feat that was thought to be impossible in the past... Well, guess it's just the right omen to encourage me to do what initially is thought to be the impossible.

Then parking was a breeze. And all the arrangements that was to be done, was done within minutes... as HR has done the necessary arrangements prior to my arrival. HR and IT was very efficient whereby my "ghastly" morning-face photo was prompty taken and a temporary pass was immediately issued to enable immediate access to the company. I was made to feel that I am part of the company immediately. My email access, login ID, telephone extension, and even business card was all ready for me on my first day!

Breakfast was a bit of a let down though, without half boiled eggs and toast... Well, nothing can be that perfect.. :) hahaha

And then I have to comment that the lift service was superb. You must understand why this impressed me .... Many employees in my previous company was in fear of being trap in a lift with 20 others. We had to live with this fear for more than a year because of the maintenance works done on those ancient elevators in the old building. The maintenance works is still on-going until the end of the year.

Another thing I liked about the building/company is the 'ladies'... which is situated within the office, i.e. one must have access through the security door before having access to the ladies. This company does put the safety of ladies first.


Then just when I thought lunch was going to be lonely (MC was on MC, (an ex-colleague whom I thought could be my regular lunch) while the rest had business lunch arrangements), my immediate boss treated the team to a nice cozy lunch.

And to top all these great happenings (sugarry sweet with cherry on top), I found a bouquet of flowers on my chair as I returned to my seat... It was such nice sweet gesture which really made my day... (Wei Keyman.. Never expect to claim my bet today... it was great timing.. Thank you sooo much... you are indeed a man who honour his words.. err.. .bets... ahahaha)

Of course I do understand that the road ahead is not all rosy and there's a lot to shoulder and to bear... but more friends make light work... As keyman once told me, didn't realise 10 years flew by, because I was too busy enjoying working with the team...

So here's to brighter, rosier days ahead.. :) Cheers...

Excited...

Yes... excited is the word I have been looking for...

Have been excited quite some time.. and tomorrow is the start of a brand new day... brand new breathe of fresh air... brand new me... at a brand new place... (pun intended as they just did a rebranding this year ahahha... so its 'brand' is new... hahaha)

Yes, I know the road ahead is not all rosy... but I am looking forward to taking that new step on that new road and face all the new faces and new things along the way.... I will try my best to enjoy the new journey.... And leave the rest to God...

Maybe I really am a workaholic.... hahaha

Wish me luck... :)

"May we all find the serenity to accept things we cannot change and the courage to change the things we can and have the wisdom to know the difference... "

~ adapted from the Serenity Prayer, Alcoholic Anonymous...

Picture source from William Warren @ GetLiberty.org archives

Smile, where have you gone?

This is the story of the girl,
Who cried a river and drown the whole world
Why she looked so sad, in photographs
I absolutely loved her... when she smiles....

... Absolutely (Story of a girl), sung by Nine Days... (2000, The Madding Crowd Album)

Pawn-der

I am just a pawn... The Kings tells me that I am special... but in actual fact, all are just selfish in their intentions... and just feeding me with just a decent meal... without fancy trimmings... while others non-deserving minions get to eat meals fit for Kings...

Busted leg, wasted night

That's it...!!!

I am keeping it dry! High and dry!!!

It's been more than 2 weeks since the Manchester United vs Liverpool game (21st March 2010) and my wound still hasn't healed. No, I am not bleeding for Liverpool due to their 1-2 loss, (I am a MU fan by the way.. :P)

I am talking about my wounded feet... Yea, I hurt my leg again... This time it's the right leg. What happened was a little stupid but I guess everyone can learn something from my silliness, so here's the story...

T'was a dark, cold and rainy night, but we brave the winds, chills and wetness to get to the game. It was the match of the year, or so they tell me. It was held in Sunway Amphitheatre... a nice stage hidden in the secluded areas of the Sunway woods, unknown to yours truly. I cannot imagine living in PJ for umpteen years and not knowing that there's an amphitheatre in Sunway.

Anyway, it was raining and the path to the amphitheatre is long, wet and winding. As I quickened my footsteps, I stepped on the slippery road bump and slided. "Wheee....!!!", I went, and not in the pleasant way... And next thing I know, I was doing a split on the slimmy tar road. As there were throngs of people trying to make their way to the amphitheater, yours truly got up promptly and gracefully, quickly gathered her composure and went forward on her way...pretending nothing has happened when in fact, blood was flowing profusely from her knees and feet. All these was thanks to the decision of wearing crocs slippers instead of sports shoes....

What happened next was like a numb travel through the passage of time where I couldn't enjoy the rest of the game..... worrying how my legs are going to heal... And that's not the worse thing. Walking back miles and miles (that's what it felt like with a wounded limb) to the car park in the rain and getting stuck for 30 minutes (no joke!) in the car park as there were too many cars exiting at the same time. Busted leg, wasted night...

Umm important lesson learnt was: don't wear crocs slippers on a wet slippery day... and don't make haste on a wet day, else you will make more waste...

Hmm come to think of it, I have been having bouts of pains lately, especially after I tendered my "splitting" intention. Suffering from a severe wisdom toothache recently, with swollen throat and gums and splitting headache pains... And then leg infection after that "graceful split"... Hmmm, wondering who is cursing me ahahha.... stop cursing me please... your blessing is important to me... :)

Your blessings is important to me.

As I read my previous post, it does sound like some grousing of a dissatisfied employee, cursing the whole world and lamenting on his own poor life. Actually, I am not complaining nor angry. I know complaning is useless and retaliation is futile. I'd like to think I am just taking a positive step towards solving my issues before it's too late. (We've always been taught to solve our own problems anyway). I am not leaving because I am unhappy. I just want to be happier. :) hahaha But really...I just want to take up an opportunity in a new environment before I get too old or too complacent.

Opportunity don't knock on a daily basis and I was taught to seize the day and grab the bull by its horns. Yes, I will be facing a lot of uncertainties but it will be a challenge that I have to take.

Wish me all the best and I really hope to go with your blessings rather than being cursed. I sincerely wish all of us success and happiness in everything we do.

Breaking off

As I updated my resume, I feel extremely sad. Embarassed actually. During my last 10 loyal years with my current company, I noticed that the company didn't really develope me. My professional/technical training column remains almost the same as it was 10 years ago. So there was no accolades to show or anything to shout about if the new employer interviews me on personal or technical development. And I have to pray that they don't delve into this department of my resume which luckily, they really didn't. How pathetic is that!!

Can you imagine, during my short stint of 6 months in a vendor company prior to my current job, I was given 3 trainings to equip me with facing a very difficult project and a very difficult customer (Citibank). 3 trainings in 6 months compared to 0 in 10 year. My point was, that company was willing to develope their staff as a person. They are willing to give as much as they are taking from us. Ok, you may wonder why I left the vendor company if it has developed me so well. Umm, there was another complicated issue back then... and the reason I left was purely personal and has nothing to do with the company. :)

I have always been a simple person. I dont ask for much, have always been nice and giving. Thus has always been the victim of being short changed. But I didnt mind as Mom always brought me up to be optimistic and be humble and be thankful for what I have. And that's why I have been just thankful for last 10 years. In other words, I am turning complacent.

And that's the last thing I want to be. I mean, c'mon, I'm still young. The road ahead of me is still long. I can't start to be complacent now. And because I wasnt much of a trouble maker and practically a workhorse, my current company thinks that I am docile. And as such, they have been happily torturing me for the last 5 years, thinking I will grow old with them as a good old obedient horse. It's worse when we see horses that seem to work less from the next stable being fed better grass only because they make more noise

The company have to understand that staff are human beings, not robot and feeds on the social biscuit just the same. And to eat that social biscuit, we need money to buy it first. So if they cannot send me for trainings, it's ok, please pay me well enough and I will go for the trainings myself. And it was my own intiative to do the MBA ... with my own money. I know that my company harps on the benefits of on-the-job training rather than professional training but seriously, they need to realise that there needs to be a balance. To have better quality work, fresh ideas and a more professional perspective and attitude towards the job, we have to inject some good professional training into the company's staff. The level of professionalism needs to be upgraded with injection of outside ideas and dynamic teachings, in order not to breed a dead pool of complacent staff.

Maybe I cannot blame my superiors because they are training me the way they best know how because they themselves do not have proper trainings themselves.

I have invested 10 years of my youth in a company that was unwilling (or forgot?) to invest in me. Perhaps they were afraid that I might leave after training me. This is so shallow of them. I have shown them again and again how passionate I was with my job with my commitment to delivery and acceptance to change without complains. And they should know by now that if I am passionate about something, I can put 101% of dedication to the issue to achieve amazing results. Toastmaster itself has helped shown this side of me but alas, management doesn't recognises this. And because of that, I have lost my passion for toasting and have resigned from the toastmaster's club. It' a shame I know, but what's the point of doing it when your heart is not there

As such, it's time to think for myself again, as the company won't think for me. Time to move on to something more concrete than holding on to empty promises. I do not have another 10 years of youth to waste. Actually, it's much like a boy-girl relationship. Why do people break off? There are many factors, but essentially, it's because one or both parties are not getting what they want from the relationship and don't see the potential to reap what they sow...and all these small small depressed feelings will eventually turn into unhappiness which will stress the relationship.

Breaking off with the company is much less complicated that a relationship breakoff but the essense is similar and no less painful. There will be a lot of reasons but there is only one result - which is going separate ways. How, where to, why, what happened and who instigated is all immaterial as everything that can be done should have happened during that 10 years and not when one party become so stressed out that they have to call it quits.

As I walk to office with a heavy heart on Monday, (as usual, breaking off carries a lot of guilt especially with a such a long term relationship), I have to remind myself that I have to be proud that I am finally taking this brave step and doing something for myself and my own future.

Atta girl... pat yourself on the back.. :)

*Breath a sigh of relieve.....*

Jokes

Little b is picking up on telling silly jokes nowadays.

He came to ask me suddenly, "Mom, why do gorilla have big nostrils?"
Then he answered by himself, "Because they have big fingers!" and went on to laugh a hearty laugh and I cannot help but laugh at his clownish antics..

He went on to ask, "What kind of nuts are not hard?"
"A donut! Wohahahahaha...Get it? A doNUT. Oooohahhahaaha."

Little b picked up all these jokes from the Cartoon Network and was practising them on me... he even wrote them down in his own "joke book", which was made-shift from one of his school exercise book.... I found that exercise book on his desk when I came home one night and did my routine check on his bag. It immediately brought a smile to my weary face.. :)

Anyway, Michael Schumacher is made his comeback in a Mercedes on the F1 race track today. It's big news on the race track in Bahrain as he managed to clinch the 7th place on the grid, the same starting position as his debut race at Spa, Belgium in 1991. Everyone is expecting some kind of magic from this seven-time champion.

Yes, it's big news alright... but I was busy washing the dishes when the race was about to start. So Big B asks little b to convey the message about Michael Schumacher's comeback to me.

Big B said, "Go tell mommy that Michael Schumacher is back."

Little b obeyed the instruction with a quick "Okay!" and proceeded to dash high speed towards the kitchen while yelling, "Mom, Michael Jackson is BAD!" ....

I couldn't help but laugh at silly little b... That was one of his funniest jokes yet... :) And the best thing was, he told it with a straight face. Aaaaaaaaaaaaarrrhahahahaa...

It's the Company that counts

Went for a poon choy dinner yesterday at a small village in Sg Buloh... The place is called Restaurant LYJ. If you do not have GPS, I think it's easy to get lost in that area especially if you are not familiar.

And it wasn't a pleasant experience at all because:

1) Traffic Jam. Even though we had carefully planned to delay our meal time from 7 to 8:30 to avoid the Friday jam, we were stuck right before the NKVE toll and the jam stretched for about 2 km. Try being hungry and stuck in what seemed to be an endless jam... and you'd know what i mean.

2) We were running out of fuel. We were so near yet so far, we were unable to get to Shell station which was located just after the toll due to the jam, (since the GPS says that our destination is only 6km away, we thought we could make it to the next petrol station as we were unaware of the stretch of jam ahead) and we had to check and recheck the GPS to see if there were another petrol station nearby. When we finally reached the petrol station, the petrol station's systems were all down. Bummer. Had to queue up for manual service.

3) The roads towards the restaurant were so narrow but the cars were driving like they are on a highway!

4) There were no more parking in front or nearby the restaurant. Had to park quite a distance away.

5) When I stepped out of the car, me with my open toe sandals went right into a puddle of dirty water.

6) As we tried to cross the road towards the restaurant, we nearly got hit by the cars which were driving at highway speed on a very narrow road that has cars doubled parked on both sides. Yep, we nearly got hit..... twice... (it was a 2 way street or should I say highway) !!!!!

7) The washroom was unisex but the toilet cubicles were wet (flooded is a more appropriate word). So I had to clean my wet leg outside the cubicles. Had to hurriedly clean up so that no one will see the ugly sight of a girl in mini skirt wiping her legs... yuks. Surely lose appetite when you see. hahaha.

8) The restaurant was sooo busy and noisy. It was a full house yesterday night and so you can imagine the noise level. We could hardly hear each other speak. Felt rude as I shouted "THANK YOU!!" (a few times) when tea was served to me.

However, we still had a lot of laughters (especially when we fight for the "jewels" in the pot) and the food was good for the price we paid. Only RM32 per person even though all 8 "hungry ghosts" were very very full after the dinner. And there were enough leftovers for Marianne.

Despite all the unpleasantries, when I reminisce the night now to write this blog, it is with a warm and funfilled feeling.

And so I can conclude that, it's not so much the food, the place, and the price. It is the company that counts.


Viva la Company! :)

2 is better than 1

There's this new song, 2 is better than 1..... Sung by Boys like girls featuring Taylor Swift..... I think it's nice...and sweet...... Give it a listen...

(Actually I wanna say, it rocks and it's awesome.... but then after listening for a while, I thought of Vege's conversation with Keyman...... as follows... and my appetite was ruined...)


SourVege: Keyman, remember for me that this download file,ABC1234 is for (some stupid reason)...

Keyman: What for want to remember? You remember lar.

SourVege: 2 people remember better than 1 mar..

Keyman: What stupid idea is that.... Don't want la. You write down in your own notebook lar... then can remember la.

SourVege: You write down in your notebook also la, so that you also can remember where to find ma.

Keyman: Don't want la. If like that also can forget, means not important. Then better don't have to remember.

SourVege: Jahat Jahat Jahat.

==================================================

But Keyman denies all the above. He says the conversation was between SourVege and MC as below:

SourVege : remember for me what color of panties I wear today, I don't 1 2 wear the same color again.....(some stupid reason)...

MC: What for want to remember? You remember lar.

SourVege: 2 people remember better than 1 mar..

MC: What stupid idea is that.... Don't want la. You write down in your own notebook lar... then can remember la.

SourVege: You write down in your notebook also la, so that you also can remember what color ma.

MC: Don't want la. If like that also can forget, better don't wear lah

SourVege: Jahat Jahat Jahat.

Colors of awareness

Why am I posting colors on my facebook status?

Many would wonder and in fact, facebook doesn't give any explanation. Facebook doesn't need to. It just serves as a powerful, far reaching, high traffic marketing tool. Nothing beats word-of-mouth as a better and more effective marketing tool. C'mon, how many times have we tried a product or changed brands because it is "highly recommended" by your friend, family etc.

Anyway, the color thingamagic is for good cause, so I just explain it here in my blog. There's a campaign to raise awareness about breast cancer and the female users of facebook are encouraged to update their status with a simple word ..... which is the color of their bra.

It is the hope of the US Cancer Cure foundation to raise awareness and educate or remind the women to check themselves often or get a mammogram because early detection can save lives. However, their spokesperson said that it wasnt them who started the facebook color craze. Even Business Week reports that they are unsure who came up with this idea.

So there you are, go update your status with all the beautiful colors...

Ok, I just updated my status with "black"... ;)

P/s. If you are not wearing any for the moment, update as *nude* .... I mean, guys.. don't think dirty.,...there are moments where you're on mobile upload and you're at the massage parlour, or hitting the showers at the gym or something... :P

Be aware, show you care...

Old batteries

Everytime I boot up my notebook, I get a warning message,"Your batteries are charging normally, but it is approaching the end of its usuable life." When I go off A/C, i.e. use it without the power cord, I get only around half an hour to an hour usage. Yes, that's a signal that I need new batteries or an alternative battery source.

Even my handphone, seems to have the same symptoms. My mobile comes with 2 batteries and they use to be able to last me more than a day each without recharge. Now, I wont be able to make/receive night calls if I don't change/recharge batteries in the afternoon. Yes, that's a signal that I need new batteries too...

Lately, I have been feeling very tired. I used to be able to make do with very little sleep...i.e I could go active a long time without A/C.... And I don't need afternoon naps to recharge...Yea, I was like the Energizer Bunny - going on and on and on...... but these couple of days, I doze off in front of the laptop at around 11pm ...

Hmmm... a signal that I need a new battery/energy source too?

Photos courtesy of Dreamstime.