Faking it

Recently, I have been down and out.
But I needed to move on.
I have to.
You wanted me to.
There's nothing I can do about it,
even though I can't (or dont want to) let go.

I seek solace in gays.
I drown myself in liquor.
I almost tried smoking.
I even tried poppy...
Nothing works...

So I tell myself that I have to be brave.
If you can do it, so must I.
And I put on a brave front.
I thread on.
There's so much that the eyes can see.
But I choose to close it.
I just turn a blind eye.
I pretend I don't see.
But I do.
I do know what's going on.

I know, but I keep quiet.
I know, but I stay strong.
I know, but I don't ask.
And it hurts to know.

You see me happy.
I try to be.
It's the only thing I can be.
It's the only thing I know how to be.
In fact, I know, I am happy just to see you.

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The author is facing slight depression after finding a strand of white hair when looking into the mirror this morning! So she's asking the lady in the mirror to age gracefully. We all know that it's never easy to let go of youth... Wish her luck.... :)

Note: I am not a girl, but still not yet an auntie.... (sung to the tune of Britney Spears' I am not a girl, not yet a woman.)

(Pictures courtesy of Inmagine http://www.inmagine.com/)