Yellow Ribbon for Helping Friends

Me joining a humourous speech contest. That must be a joke. Me being given less than 10 hours notice that I have been entered into the competition is a bigger joke. Amazingly, I actually accepted the challenge. (Actually, I was made to do this. I mean, your CIO came up to you and ask you nicely whether you can help to do the speech. And this is not the first time he asked (a few times and all nicely some more)... Well, since I already was preparing for my second speech, I thought, what the heck, just do it.... I had tough time preparing myself mentally but my funny friends really did help ease the burden by sharing my worries (really does beat carrying the mental anxiety all alone) :)

And when it was time to speak, it was comforting to know that I was speaking on home ground with all my supporters behind me... (yea, now I know how MU feels playing at Old Trafford).... Anyway, I was still nervous... as I was up against all the veterens. These people definitely looked seasoned but I thought, what the heck, it was the experience that counts. To cut a long story short, yours truly got 3rd place!!! Not bad for a new comer, eh? And it feels really good when Mr. VPE (sorta like the Minister of Education in Toastmasters terms) came up to me and say, "If there was a prize for "Best Newcomer Award", I should be the one receiving it. :) Well, yours truly was all smiles when the whole thing was over... If you were there, you really could see me breathe a sigh of relieve that I hadn't let my whole club down... :)

Here's the "humourous" speech that I made that day... haven't have the chance t get my hands on the video and the photos of the winners... so you'll just have to put up with the 3rd best thing for now...

===========================================================

Friends helping friends to succeed.

Good evening ladies and gentlemen,

How many of you have friends, raise your hands? Or How many of us don’t have friends? So pitiful, come and see me later, I will try to arrange something for you.

Fellow toastmasters, guests, and friends,

“Friends helping friends to succeed”. I find this tagline very appropriate because essentially Toastmasters is a non-profitable club and so what is the driving force behind all you motivated members? This is not the official answer, but I find that one of the driving force is friendship.

I feel honoured to be amongst friends today, friends like all of you, helping me to succeed in my communication, in my speech and in so many other uncountable ways. We have all kinds of friends, some are good, and some are not. So what is friendship, really?

Friendship is a special kind of bonding that is similar but yet differs from all other relationship. It starts from acquaintance but friendship differs from social acquaintanceship, as friendship is based on love. It defers from lovers and marriage, as friendship is free from jealousy. Unlike family ties, friendship is not a responsibility but build on voluntary affection. Friendship has no status in law. Business partnerships are based on contract, so is marriage. Parents are bound by the law, as are the children.

Friends are there to stand by you, to give you courage, a push when you’re stuck, a helping hand when you need one and a steady shoulder to lean on when you you’re down.
I have to say I am lucky to have friends. I was stuck with this speech for quite a while and due to my lack of experience, I couldn’t find anything to say. I told my friends that I have a problem, and they laughed at me. I told them, “No, I have a serious problem.” They laughed even louder. They said, “Kelly, don’t worry. You don’t have t be a One Speech wonder. We can help you become a legend like Michael Jackson!”

And then they brought me to a tea session to help me loosen up and get my speech going. And they came up with 1001 topics for me to talk about. Some of the more interesting one was to talk about my dating experience as they thought you all would like to know about my past boyfriends… or girlfriends. But no, I can’t talk about relationships as I am not the type who kiss and tell. So don’t worry Alan, your secret is safe with me.

And they also suggested talking about my funny experience of how they have helped me make my decision to replace 10 year old car. Not too long ago, I went on a car hunting trip to replace my 10 year old jalopy, my dear old Iswara. I was so serious about getting a new car because I am a person who drives a car for a very very long time (yes I am a very loyal person). So I want to have the best car possible with the limited budget that I have. Thus I came up with a spreadsheet. IT people always come out with spreadsheets to do comparison. Look at all the parameters.

[Show PPT Spreadsheet]

You know I am a serious buyer when you see my spreadsheet. And then I showed this spreadsheet to those lighthearted friends of mine and guess what they did? They changed all the inputs for the parameters to compare girls!!!!

These friends of mine helped me see the lighter side of everything and help loosen me up so that I can be myself and excel. There have been there with me through some thicks and some thins. Friends bask in each other’s success, and despair together over failures. Friends take care of each other, nurse each other and learn from each other’s lessons. Life is too short to make all the mistakes by ourselves, and that’s why you need to learn from friend’s lessons.

So you can see how important friends are to me. And incidentally Alan has adopted the “Friends helping friends to succeed” as our ING Leadership Toastmaster’s club tagline. I will conclude with this simple poem that I wrote on how friends can help friends to succeed:

Friends cannot solve all your problems, doubts and fears
But they can listen to you and help you find courage and answers
Friends cannot change the past, the heartaches and pains
But they can remind you not to make the same mistakes again,

Friends dont take your joys, triumphs, successes
But they are here to share your sorrows and happiness
So take my hand and a journey together we proceed,
And let friends help friends to succeed.

To Ah is human

Yours truly was the “ ’ah!’ counter” for the day. Ah counter is one of the roles played in the Toastmasters International Club and it’s purpose is mainly for personal growth, i.e. to practise the listening skills. The Ah Counter also helps the speakers get off their crutches and their dependencies on “Pause Fillers” during their presentation.

The role of an Ah Counters is exactly what the Title depicts. I count the number of Ahs that is used in a presenter’s speech. Actually I count other words or sounds such as “Ummm”, “Err”, “La”, “You know”, “So”, “Ok” etc. These are what the people in the public presentation world call “Pause Fillers”. Pause fillers are considered crutches that a speaker use to sustain their speech. In other words, pause fillers are, y’know, the time when you stand out in front of the crowd and you forgot what you wanna say and you start saying,” Ummm”, to break the silence while you try to remember the next line of your speech. Opps… I am also a sinner in this area. I use “Ah”,”Lah”, “Ok”, “Ummm”, ever so often that it has become second nature to me while talking and even while writing. Everyone does it, afterall, to “ah” is human, I mean, to err is human… :) We all do it but with the feedback from the ah counter, we hope that the dependencies on these Pause fillers are reduced if not eliminated.

Incidentally, today we found that even the most experienced speakers uses pause fillers in their speech, subconsciously… So to those new in public speaking don’t despair. Help is on the way. With more practise, we can all get rid of these crutches and stand on our own two feet.

To "ah" is human,
To forgive divine,
Lessons learnt are for a lifetime...

To learn is to change,
To change is to grow,
To grow is to a better tomorrow.

Toast to a better you and me. Cheers.