Wilting Flower Getting Excess Flab

Sunday- 26/11/2006.
It’s a week now. The beautiful sweet smell of lilies and pink roses (Oh, incidentally Richard thinks pink roses meant “indecision”!!! Gosh! I haven’t confronted Brandon yet though) have reduced to somewhat of a pong. And to avoid the pollens from staining everything it falls upon, I had to throw them away (yes, the stamen of lilies produces yellowish pollens which will stain everything, even your hand, like iodine - and being the male reproductive organ, they can be kinda sticky,... hahaha). Hmmm so RM250 lasted for about a week – (not so value for money eh Kee?).

Brandon forbids me from keeping the feather scarf as he didn’t want me to go out with that “thing”. *Actually he doesn’t want to be seen with me in feathers. I thought it was quite kinky though. Ha ha. So I decided to keep it for my sister. She always wanted a feather scarf (if my memory doesn’t fail me… hahaha…)

Talking about wilting flowers, I felt like one over the weekend. We went shopping at Times Square (yeah, one of the rare occasions when Brandon would bring me shopping!). Actually it was Bryan’s request as he wanted to watch IMAX dinosaurs again to prove that he is not afraid. The last time we went, he took off his 3D glasses, covered his eyes and turned around shouting, “I can’t see this, I can’t see this!!!” Well, he was only 3 then and it was his first 3D experience, he was quite terrified. Unfortunately for him, he can’t prove himself as Nicol David did with winning yet another British Open to remain World #1. There wasn’t any 3D movie till late evening due to 007’s Casino Royale taking up most of the screening times. Anyway, back to the shopping experience. I needed a couple of new outfits to attend a couple of Brandon’s friends’ weddings and parties. Incidentally, I have used up all my fancy dresses last month after attending 4 weddings (True enough, there was a funeral too but I won’t talk about gloomy stuffs here.). So we went to Metrojaya which usually houses a lot of party dresses at this time of the year.

As I stepped in, I was quite excited as they had already started to promote Xmas shopping which meant they have a lot of party dresses. True enough, we both found a glittery bluish grey lacy dress that we both liked just seconds after setting foot into the women’s department. However, it only came in XS size. The sales girl reminded me to “be careful” with the dress when she told me that they were out of S or M size. Hrrmmmpfff….. Do I look like an M size? Anyway, I strode into the dressing room and excitedly tried it on. Hmmm… all was fine except the reflection on the mirror. Who is this Fat Lady staring back at me? It was awful. The soft t-shirt type material clings on to me, making me look like a “dumpling” (Kuih Bah Chang). It was a strapless gown which made my shoulders and arms look like Chicken (maybe Turkey) drumsticks. I didn’t even have the guts to show Brandon. I just took it off and it has completely ruined my shopping experience. Then Brandon suggested perhaps it was the color that was a problem and selected another red get-up for me to try on. Boy, it was the same… it didn’t flatter my curves (or whatever that’s left of it) at all!!!!

That’s it…. Let’s go to the shoes department…. my legs couldn’t possibly be fat… but wait….. As I was looking at the mirror to admire my beautiful long legs with those stylish shoes, .. “eh, what’s that dimple doing on my thighs?” ….. Arghhhhhh, CELLULITE!!! Those sneaky b**tards have somehow found their way to latch onto my legs…. Arrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhh…. This shocked frenzied mother need to go home to calm down…

Hmmm, let’s switch on the tele to take my mind off the whole “FAT” thing. Oh, our favourite movie, Mr and Mrs Smith. Darn, Angelina is sooooo pretty. She purposely showed off her cellulite-free thighs and stick thin torso and meatless shoulders and stick-thin arms…. Hrmmmpfffhhhh… this is too much… I thought I had better go to bed to think about work the next day. Hmm, it really didn’t help that I have 3 male colleagues who is as thin as Justin Timberlake. Even the one who is of William Hung’s size thinks I have a fat (yes it’s not a typo, he said FAT not FLAT) tummy… Arrghhhh I think I will go and get an OSIM U-zap during lunch…. Or maybe seriously rethink my decision of not needing to join a gym. Incidentally, my colleagues gave me a whole new reason to go. They say gyms are filled with rich Datins and Gigolos!!! They also say gigolos usually come in six-packs and good looks… so I might add that to my Pro-Gym list. What’s in my Con-Gym list? Well, no appropriate gear is the #1 excuse (I told Brandon that I didn’t have any gym shoes and he asks me to get one from BATA!). Con-Gym list #2 - #30 is filled up with the word Lazy!!! Hahaha… So now that I have found an entry onto the Pro-Gym list, only 29 to go before I decide to join a gym ahahhaha,,,,,

20/11/2006 - Pleasant Surprise

It was a pleasant surprise. It’s been 5-6 years since I last received any bouquets from Brandon (not that I am counting ha ha), so when I saw the flowers on my desk after coming back from the hair salon (again?!) after lunch, it was a pleasant surprise. I was so surprised that I was oblivious to the fact my big boss (Head of the Solutions Division) followed me to my desk and started snooping about the flowers. He took out the card and I jokingly said, “Hey, I haven’t even read the card!” And he said, “Aiyah, the rest of the team have already all read it lar, I am not the first. I just came here!”. I couldn’t think of any smart retorts then. In fact, I couldn’t think at all then… I was too shock. I remember I murmured under my breath that “Luckily, it’s from my husband!”, to which my megaphone boss reiterated, “Huh, lucky ah? Why lucky?” … hahahaha… I just laughed and let his imagination answer that (not sure if he has any imagination hahahah)….

Only in the morning I was telling my buddies that I don’t want flowers as they were a total waste of money and they can’t be eaten! (Really, when I found out the price of the flowers, I thought I could make better use of it to go for hair treatment instead or maybe Geoducks!!). And I was so confident that Brandon understood me well enough to send something more practical (or perhaps edible!). But what do you know!! A bunch of flowers unveiled before my eyes just as I stepped foot into the office on that unsuspecting afternoon.

Anyway, after calming down for a few seconds, I started checking out the bouquet. Hmm, Lilies of the valley… and some pink roses and Forget-Me-Nots …. And some red seeds which I have yet to find out the names and their meanings. Anyway, a fellow colleague, Richard, said that pink roses are not appropriate, it should be red. I have yet to find out the real meaning but Richard sounded suspicious when he asked me “why pink roses?”. Well, knowing Brandon, he would just tell the florist to get me some lilies as he knows I liked them. The rest, like he puts it, are just mere decorations. And I don’t think he would bothered to be so meticulous as to find out what matches with which flower and what each colour/flower meant. So it was really a surprise that he even took the trouble to go to the florist at all. (Well, later I found out that the florist was located next to his agent’s shop ha ha. He was there on a business meeting). Oh, the funniest thing was the flowers came with a “Kinky White Feather Scarf”. Well, colleagues were laughing their head off because of the term, “Kai Mou Ngap Huit” in Cantonese (Chicken Feathers, Duck Blood). And they were implying that Loke Wee, a male colleague who had received flowers and a cake for his birthday just 2 weeks ago, has caused other’s to be in “Kai Mou Ngap Huit” situation as they were using him as a “Standard” or “Benchmark” for receiving flowers on birthdays. Loke Wee said that he has already given serious (*but not harsh) warning to the girlfriend not to send those next year. Pity the girlfriend ahahaha… I remembered getting the same warning from Brandon when I sent him some yellow roses years ago.

Well, the celebrations went on at the karaoke. We sang our hearts out with mostly duet ballads. We even took some videos of our singing. Boy, were those videos funny! It captured our horrendous singing and also my “hearty” laughter. Now I know I am not that petite after all hahahah…. We left early as we wanted to celebrate with our son too, so we bought an ice-cream cake home so that son can blow the candles as well. My son was happily jumping around like a frog and stopped in front of me and asked me to kiss him. I thought he just learnt the Frog Prince at school and wanted to turn into a Prince with my kiss. So I obliged and gave him a peck on the head. When I did, he jumped up and said he has transformed…. Into DONALD DUCK! Hahahaa… Then he told me he has just watched “the frog prince” on Playhouse with Mickey Mouse. Hahaha, the things they teach on TV nowadays….

All in all it was a beautiful celebration, one of the best I would say. But then again, every year I would say it’s the best, much like the James Bond advertisement which always claim the current 007 movie to be “THE” best James Bond movie ever each time a new James Bond movie is produced. Ha ha. Didn’t manage to catch the Casino Royale as planned but will probably catch it next week when it’s under “free list allowed”. Must make use of the free birthday ticket, you see. Hahahahaha… Cheapskate….

Thanks for all the birthday wishes. Have a great year ahead too!